Recently, a father of seven shared something in a thread that could change his entire summer with his kids. Maybe it’s time to let go of the pressure of an “epic” summer bucket list and opt for something more doable (but still memorable).
His whole argument? The best summer memories don’t come from careful planning. They come from repeatable anchors: simple acts, achievable adventures, and anticipation-building moments. He calls it a “summer memory map.”
“I heard a father of a 7-year-old explain how he thinks about summer with his kids. And I want you to hear this: The best summer memories usually come from repeatable anchors, not a well-thought-out plan,” thread user Dylan (@parentingwithsystems) credits another “father of 7” with this advice in a post in the now-viral thread.
1. Small weekly rituals
“This should be enough to get you through a tiring week. Think about it: Friday pancakes, Sunday night walks, library mornings, ice cream in the backyard, post-dinner bike rides, porch ice cream, blankets to watch movies, Saturday donuts in pajamas. If you need matching outfits, reservations, and the mental stamina of an espresso-drinking camp counselor, that’s too much,” he wrote.
The important thing is that this ritual is something that families can do actually Randomly run on a Friday when everyone is exhausted after a long week.
2. “Fandango” once a month
“Fandango is not a vacation,” he explains. “This is not the Core Memory Olympics.”
A “monthly fandango” is a “slightly bigger” activity or event that gives the month some form on the calendar. He gives examples like trips to the creek, camping in the backyard, sleepovers with cousins, minor league baseball games, picnic dinners in the park, ice cream crawls, and mornings at museums.
“Goals aren’t impressive. Goals are predictable. Kids like to have something to look forward to,” he explains.
3. Child-led one choice
“So much of our summer plans are made around our kids, rather than with them. We decide the camps, weekend plans, dinners, activities, routes, timings, rules. And we wonder why they act like disgruntled little executives with no voting rights. They don’t have to run the house. They need a little ownership,” he continues.
If possible, encourage your children to take the lead in suggesting something fun to do for the family. Usually they just want to go get ice cream or take pizza to the pool.
4. A memorable moment when there was no phone
we could all Use this last pillar. A simple detox from screens can have a positive impact on the world. OP makes it clear that the phone is useful (the phone includes photos, a grocery list, and the camp pick-up address). However, as the OP states, “Some moments are lived before it was documented. ”
The setup for this is a 10-minute family conversation and four questions.
- What is our weekly ritual?
- What’s this month’s Fandango?
- What choices can children make?
- What are the moments when you don’t need to use your phone?
“Write the answer somewhere visible, because the plan has to exist outside of one parent’s brain before it actually becomes part of family life,” he points out.
Kids don’t need a perfect summer. All you need is a few fun things to look forward to with your loved ones. That’s really true that Simple.
