lauren davidson
“Mom, how much money do I have?” This is a question we often ask in our household.
My kids know that I track “their” money on the app “My First Nest Egg.” Most of the things they want to buy are digital, so I ditched the physical piggy bank in favor of an app. So when they want to know their balance, they usually shout it out for me while I’m on an important call.
Usually they each have a few dollars to their name. Often, Grandpa secretly gives it to them on a previous visit, or as a reward for a good report card. My oldest son, who is 11, receives $4 a week in pocket money in exchange for setting and cleaning the table every day. Other than that, he usually does any chores we ask him to do without complaining. I love that the app automatically adds $4 to his account every Friday.
Usually what they want to buy is something that’s in the latest Minecraft world. Sometimes they ask if they can upgrade something they bought at the ice cream stand in exchange for a dollar or two.
But I keep track of “their” money, and if they’re receiving more than a few dollars at a time, chances are I’m keeping it.
Sorry, but if my 11-year-old son gets $60 after his birthday, I’m not going to donate $5 to Robux 12 times when I could use that money for shoes for school. Or soccer shoes. Or soccer socks. Or soccer registration. And, you know, his food and shelter.
(Have you ever played Roblox? Robux basically just speeds up the endless coin collecting you do in certain games. I’m not opposed to spending money on video games from time to time, but I find it very difficult to spend money on Robux.)
I have a wonderful aunt who regularly sends me checks with a note on them that says, “Buy something fun for the kids!” I would love to. But times are tough. I have kids who still do pull-ups at night, and I still have to pay for kindergarten tuition, so any significant gift we receive will be a huge help to two parents who are still paying off student loans from 20 years ago, instead of two kids spending money on Robux.
Can I use that money for a trip to the zoo or trampoline park? Yes. I would love to do that again. But I have four kids who can eat through a box of granola bars or a Gogurt value pack in a day. And every penny you give me for them is a boon to our food costs.
When my second graders had their first communion at our church, we invited our relatives to the service and then went out to dinner. A fancy dinner out was not in our budget, but I knew my grandpa would be willing to pay for it, so I wanted it to be a special occasion.
My brother and his fiancée drove in from out of state, my wonderful aunt joined us, and Grandma and Grandpa were dressed in their Sunday clothes and beaming smiles for their beloved little boy. Despite my protests, each guest handed my child an envelope containing a card and a large amount of cash.
Suddenly my 8 year old son was eating things that cost over $100.
On the way home, I asked my child (okay, I told him) that some of the money he received would go toward dinner. He was 8 years old and didn’t know how he would spend $100, so he easily agreed.
I let him have $25, which honestly was more than I wanted my family to spend on Robux, but I want him to choose how to spend money that I consider “his,” and he’s a kid who likes Robux.
My mom knew exactly how much he had received that day, so she sent me an email asking if I could open a savings account for him.
“One of the best gifts you can give them is money management,” she wrote. “He’ll thank you someday when he needs to get a cell phone or take his date to the movies.”
I also agree with her in theory. And I believe it’s wise to start teaching children good spending and saving habits at a young age.
But with expenses mounting, maintaining a savings account for each of my four children seems like a pipe dream. That’s unthinkable for a family of six looking to pay off debt and save up for a home in 2025. I’m on a very tight budget, so $100 can go a long way.
So if you give me money for my kids, I’ll keep it. Manners may not approve. But believe me, me spending money on their school supplies is way better than them buying digital currency.
In an ideal world, my children would learn how to save, spend, and donate money. I hope to teach them how to do that someday.
But that day is not today.
lauren davidson I’m a Pittsburgh-based writer and editor who focuses on parenting, arts and culture, and weddings. She has worked for newspapers and magazines in New England and Western Pennsylvania and is a graduate of the University of Pittsburgh with degrees in English and French. She lives with her editor husband, four active children, and one loving cat. Follow her on Twitter @laurenmylo.
